Finding the reason...(nope not there yet)

I have many reasons for doing the things I do. Some out of necessity and some out of comfort. For example, I commute day in and day out to my good job to support my family. My son needs diapers, food and clothes. My wife needs a house, heat and a nice bed (among other things). So the pain is worth it, as there is a reason for doing it.

I move because I have to. Exercise has been a necessity for me since my youth. It fights fatigue and provides me an outlet to manage stress. Over the years the type of exercise has changed - volleyball, softball, rugby, swimming, running, Bikram Yoga and CrossFit. One of the key attributes of each of these activities for me, is a mindlessness. At some point the mind and body dissociate. Breathing takes over, the mind shuts down and the body just does. That is where there is peace for me.

There has always been that stage of learning - figuring things out. I'm slightly obsessive, so I rerun things over and over in my mind until my body does it. This, of course, clogs my brain and causes me some anxiety. I'm realizing (through this activity of writing) that the training I'm doing with Risto doesn't have that mindless component yet. Every lift. Every movement. Every muscle. Every pull and push and squat and press. It all takes my brain to figure out. And the second it doesn't, I have pain...which brings me back into my brain and disrupts my breathing. 

There is nothing more frustrating for an athlete than pain.... Seriously....

I have options though, moving forward.... I signed up for a year with Risto, so I plan to complete my year. In the meantime:
1. I can incorporate more mindless activities - such as running, or crossift, or swimming.
2. I can stop being so obsessive about this training and try to just move. This might also be part of my block in mastering the movements.
3. I can try to take a step back and stop pressuring myself.
4. I can incorporate more meditation or yoga into my routine.

5. I can write more.

So these are all ways to cope with the change in training and to overcome the curve that is learning.

It's still not the reason for picking up Olympic Lifting as a sport at the age of 40...