Boredom could be simply a lack of mission

"A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history." -- Mahatma Gandhi


The other day I attended a monthly meeting at work.  The first presentation was about identifying the mission of your work; clarifying roles and responsibilities; and marketing or communicating your services to your clients or target audience.  With regard to my work in research administration, this topic resulted in me rolling my eyes and exclaiming, "duh!" in my head.  Then it got me thinking more about the idea of "mission" and how it can apply to creating a fulfilling life.

So for those of you struggling with monotony, restlessness, emptiness and/or boredom (at work) this is for you.

Why can't we align our personal mission with our bread and butter?  I think this is the missing link between just working a job and working a fulfilling job (or life).  First, you have to come up with a personal mission statement.  This could be something so near and dear to your heart that you make sure it is a part of your daily routine, or you give to the cause, or you make sure it is part of your vacation plans.  Whatever it may be, it may be simpler than you think.  Additionally, it is probably something you planted a long time ago and is so completely a part of who you are.

I am reminded of the goal my rheumatologist gave for treating my arthritis --"To keep you moving."  Why?  Because exercise and movement are so intrinsically a part of who I am.  Movement is where I excel.  It keeps me sane.  It is my social network.  It is my conversation.  It is how I relate to the world.  It challenges me to keep growing - physically, mentally and emotionally.  Movement drives my whole world (including diet).

God love my rheumatologist.  She figured this out about me at our first meeting after talking to me for 10 minutes.  This is one of those things that has taken me 38 years of struggle to transform from being just a part of who I am as an individual to something I can share with the others as my "mission".

From struggle arises inspiration.  I am inspired to help get people moving.  Arthritis affects you or someone you know in some way.  The problem with arthritis is that it causes pain and stiffness which leads to inactivity. Time and time again, research has shown that moving helps reduce pain, stiffness, and helps increase strength to support joint stability and mobility (and daily activities).

I happened upon an online RA support group when I needed it most.  What I found over time though was that some people were stuck in their disease.  (I have been there.)  They continue to make choices that perpetuate their disease.  What these (and most, if not all) people need is not only community, but community in action.  I propose to be the person that helps create that bridge between hopelessness and inactivity to movement and prosperity of spirit through (God forbid!!) exercise and community.

The mission is to "get people moving."  The "how" is still being worked out.  I am on my way though...      

Ride the wave baby

"Life is like a wave.  You can't change the way it breaks, but you can change the way you ride it." 
--- Urban Surfer 2006

I try really hard to stay positive and keep myself moving.  Sometimes I overdo it.  Sometimes it feels good to be sore.  I recall when I played rugby I was sore all of the time.  I wasn't on any drugs for my RA either (except post-game beers).  I'm on drugs now and I'm pretty much sore all of the time with CrossFit and Bikram.  I like it because it reminds me that I am pushing myself and my body to be healthier and stronger.  

I overdo it with my diet sometimes too.  I follow a mostly Paleo diet, which means I've cut out all dairy - which little did I know can really flare me up.  I also eat no grains as they have the same effect as dairy.  So, on the occasions when I "cheat" I feel it the next day.  (Like the mashed potatoes with cream and cheese at Easter dinner!!!)  

I feel sensitive - there is such a fine line between overdoing it and doing just enough.  One workout too many....one spoonful too much of something...one night of bad sleep...one this or one that.  It is exhausting both keeping myself in line and keeping track of what went wrong!

I went to my rheumatologist a couple of weeks ago and she had the same advice as she always does.  Take the methotrexate (MTX)! I am soooo close to remission and she thinks the addition of MTX will take me over the edge.  I am already on Enbrel - which means I have to shoot myself 1x a week.  MTX will also be a once weekly dose.  Both drugs are immunosuppressants, leaving me more susceptible to infection.

Why would I be at all resistant to going into full-blown remission?  I'm not.  I'm resistant to relying on drugs to do it for me, nasty drugs at that.  The miraculous body has systems to maintain homeostasis.  Why can't I do it with diet and exercise alone?      

At the same time...might taking the MTX make homeostasis easier to attain? THAT, my friends, is what I want to find out.  Wednesday was my first dose.  Wish me luck!!

***************************************************

A little info on the drugs:
Enbrel is a TNF-inhibitor.  This reduces the inflammation in the body, but also reduces the immune response.  (This drug has changed my life!!!)  Here is a short list of common side effects:
Dizziness; headache; mild pain, redness, itching, bruising, or swelling around the injection site....  

And here is the long list:  Enbrel Side Effects

Methotrexate is a chemo drug.  (Yes, chemotherapy.)  It is used in lower doses for RA, but has similar side effects.  I was on only it for about 10 months and by the end, stopped because it made me feel sick.  I have to have my blood checked every 1-3 months to ensure it isn't wreaking havoc on my system.    Common side effects:
Dizziness; drowsiness; general body discomfort; headache; loss of appetite; mild hair loss; mild sore throat; mild stomach pain; nausea; tiredness...
    

And here is the long list: Methotrexate side effects

Defining Age

It is spring.  Well it is certainly trying to be.  We had a week of 80-something degree weather and then a smack in the face with the return of the 20s.  The fact remains that there will be a period of time soon when the weather is consistently warm and the sun is bright.  Inevitably, the cycle will continue and short days and cold nights will return.  The clock keeps ticking and time keeps passing. 

I am feeling old today.  (Cue violin.)   

The problem is that I still feel physically and mentally young.  (Thank you CrossFit, Bikram and Damema!)  Isn't that the important stuff?  Who defined this idea of time any way?  By 22 you need to have your life figured out.  By 40 your kids need to be out of diapers.  By 45 you need to be at the top of your career game. Where did this crap come from?

Arbitrary deadlines aside, there is one major area that is affected early on - fertility.  My mom had 3 kids by the age of 30.  We were not ready to have kids at even 35.  We put time limits on ourselves and determined that if we didn't decide to have kids by 34 we wouldn't .  The problem (or gift) is that now we are ready.  Let me just say that the pipes don't work the way they used to.  I guess I'll leave it at that.  Luckily, we make more money now than we did at 30, which makes adoption a more viable option.     
    
Another part of aging is that your health goes to pot - right? I've had a recent health event that resulted in a number of tests.  The diagnosis isn't a big deal - just another autoimmune skin disease.  In the process though, I did get my lipids tested and wooooweeee honey, I am healthy.  (Wait, aren't I supposed to be beginning my decline?)  My overall cholesterol is 170 with the HDL (good guys) at 101 and the LDL (bad guys) at 61.  My triglycerides are 30 or something crazy like that.  I guess not all pipes are created equal.  

Honestly, I was a touch worried with my diet shifting to more protein and fat (and eggs, so many eggs).  I know, I know... fat doesn't make you fat.  I was still worried none-the-less.  (Eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little starch and NO SUGAR.)

I could come up with some cliche about life and living in the moment.  Or another quote about how worry is meaningless.  What I've come to understand is that it is the relationships that matter.  The friends, adopted family, family, and acquaintances that make my life rich.  (And exercise and music and wine and chocolate.)  As long as I can engage with others, laugh, and move myself on my own, including swaying to the music, life will remain pretty swell.  Whatever the future may hold, though I may feel old, bring it!